Prayers and Connections
by Ayshen
Summary: In the midst of tragedy some connections cannot be denied. SEXIS


**Okay, I was inspired by the recent epidemic. This will most likely be a stand-alone, unless I get inspired. There are a lot of different points of view, and I tried to use the least amount of names…hopefully they speak for themselves. Well hope you enjoy, and feedback is greatly appreciated!**

General Hospital Chapel:

Bet you didn't expect me in here, huh? Well I have a favor to ask you. I know you probably shouldn't grant me any of my prayers because usually I make a big mess of things. Well I am going to be selfish and ask you again. Please don't take her. That's it; I am not going to make some grandiose speech about how I am going to make things better for us if you do. I can't promise that I won't yell at her again; or tell her to butt out of my life. The thing is I remember who I am when I see her. I remember that man that I wanted to be for her. She was the best friend I ever had, and I trusted her totally and completely. Now that I look back at the past I wish I could have made different choices, but I didn't I chose to let her go. I always thought we would get the chance to go back to some semblance of what we were before…so if you are listening, don't take that option away. Please do not take her away from me. Just give me the chance to make it better

Room 201:

I suppose there is no use to argue with you because if you have decided to take me; than really I have no say. I know you are surprised at the fact that I am not pleading my case with you because we know I do it so well. I guess I figure I am not going to ask for anything selfish because you have answered so many of my prayers for my girls. My girls…who would have thought that I would have two children? I thank the heavens everyday for those two. Molly is my little princess, everyday I look at her and I say a silent prayer that you gave her to Ric and me. Then there is my Angel. I know that she was a gift from above; I am sure my sister had a hand in sending her down to me. There is only one thing I regret with Kristina…I shouldn't have kept her from him. I knew what it was like to lose my child when Ned gained custody, and still I took that option away from him. I know I said I wouldn't ask for anything, but please don't let me leave this earth without telling him that I am sorry. There is so much bad blood between us, and I never wanted it to be this way. He loves her so much, and they belong together. I know it when I look at her face, and see her smile for her daddy. I am sure you cursed me with her looking more and more like him everyday. It makes me remember how much I miss my friend. So if you are listening, just give me one chance to make it better.

I don't know why I am here. The doctors said I could go home, but when I walked past her room and saw her lying in bed…I couldn't leave. So here I am talking to her sleeping form.

"C'mon Lex, wake up for me. Just open those pretty eyes and talk to me. Heck, yell at me, hit me…just open those eyes"

I hear him…that voice that angers me, and yet endears me at the same time. My lids feel heavy; so I will just sit here awhile and listen to his voice. It has always had this calming affect on me…even when he was being annoying and telling me to breathe.

"I'm sorry, I know you probably wouldn't have guessed it…but I am. I am sorry for everything that has happened between us. I miss you Lex, I miss my best friend. I miss the one person that I could trust with everything. I miss talking to you, teasing you, I miss being me. You were the only one I have ever taken my mask off for…not Brenda, not Carly…only you. Who would have thought that you would give me my first born? She is perfect you know…looks more and more like her mama everyday. I am so glad you are her mother Alexis; I couldn't have picked anyone better. Forgive me, for becoming a shell of my self…you made me a better man, and I will do everything in my power to become that man again for you. Please Lex…don't leave her…she needs you…Lex, I need you."

I feel him holding my hand, he feels so warm. Maybe its time I opened my eyes. He smiles sadly at me, and I smile back.

"I've missed us too. I miss being around you, laughing with you, being me. I don't know where exactly were we went wrong…but I would take none of it back. You gave me the most precious gift a person can ask for. You gave me Kristina, and the only thing I regret is that I kept her from you. I'm sorry for that…you belong together…and I know you will love her for me"

"Hey, hey…none of that…I forgive you, okay for everything. Just don't leave us…who is going to yell at me when I am being a jerk…I need you Lex."

He takes her hands and no more words need to be said as they just sit quietly. Soon after she falls asleep he lays his head down next to their intertwined hands and sleeps too.

I am looking for Sonny everywhere. I hope he is not with Emily; or Jason might really kill him this time. That's when I walk past the room and see where he is. He is with her…I could have guessed it; it always comes back to her. She is the one I can never do anything about. They have this connection…one I cannot explain, and one that I just try to pretend isn't there. Despite what he says, it isn't because of Kristina…nope it was way before Kristina. I knew it the first time we got married, and the second…even the third. There is a big chunk of his heart that will always belong to her. There is nothing I can do about it…so I walk away.

I asked Monica Quartermaine how my wife was doing. She didn't smile when she told me that she was doing okay, and that Sonny was with her. To say I am surprised would be a lie. I know she still loves him; I can tell it in her voice when she rants about him. She believes that he can be a better man, and she can't stand to see him self-destruct. Maybe I should be a little more upset that my wife is still in love with my brother…but I knew it from the start, and I have come to accept that it is something I cannot change. She has given me what she can of her heart…but you cannot give someone something that you gave away long ago…and never got back.

I am looking for Sonny everywhere, he seems to have disappeared. When I run into Liz she tells me that he is in with Alexis. I ran over there thinking they were having one of their infamous fights, but there he is…his head on her bed, sleeping next to her. I guess I never knew how deep their connection was. He told me it was because of Kristina and that they had a friendship before, and that he didn't want to hurt me like he hurt her. I guess now I see that he couldn't ever hurt me like her hurt her...because our connection is not the same as there's. I doubt any connection he has will ever be as great as the one he has with her. So I turn and walk away and I will pretend that it isn't there.

In the midst of the chaos two people lay connected…not just by a joining of hands, but by a love that transcends time and place. It is true that there would be others in their lives, but what they had was on a higher level. They were beyond lovers, beyond friends…they were soul mates…and no matter whom they were with, or where they were at…they would always come back to each other…


End file.
